Update Number 17

Hello all

I've been a bit bipolar recently and a bit grumpy but I am feeling really good again. It's been a week since chemo and I am finally feeling human again. I think that is just how long it will take each time which sucks but at least we can plan and cater for my absence from society and humanity with a bit of forward planning and fridge filling prior to chemo. Cancer Emma isn't too much fun so we should just keep her locked up methinks! Saying that boring ill Emma breeds fun active Emma so I guess she can stay for the next 5 months if she keeps quiet.

I have been a busy little bee and in order to keep my little brain stimulated, I have created a blog which include all my updates from hospital and a couple of additional videos, photos and links of my time in hospital and beyond!! I keep forgetting people on the emails and not sure if everyone has seen all the past updates so now I need not worry because it'll be up to you check- i'm so so lazy now! The address is http://taurusnotcancer.blogspot.com/- enjoy!!

This week has been pretty calm apart from a couple of hospital visits for check ups and bloods. I had my stitches in my chest of the line out so it's wonderful that that is the biggest news of the week. All seems to be going well with the body so I am not complaining except I have joined the world of the follicly impaired- yep that's right- I'm bald!!! Very bald and I have to say it's a very weird experience- seeing your head!

Now you see it....

Now you don't...errr,,,hold on that's not right...

Ew! The bath- sorry I had to add!

Last Sunday my hair was still staying put but only because I wasn't washing it or even touching it for fear it would fall out except I was shedding everywhere I lay my head. So I took the bull by it's horns and with the help of my superstar boyfriend we washed my hair and got me about 90% bald! Simon even cleaned up the bath and was an absolute support for me when I was a little teary. It was so cathartic and although a little emotional, I felt all the better after. It was going to happen eventually so it was nice to be in control. It was rather fitting that Sunday was also Halloween so as we, Simon, the bald head and me watched The Witches and avoided trick or treaters (I did it last year so I thought my fellow building mates could step up this year), for the first time in my life, I could relate to The Witches. They were just misunderstood. You would be grumpy and bitter too if you had horrible bald heads like they do. Such a shame. Simon almost undid all his good work by suggesting I didn't need a costume this year and I could easily answer the door and scare small children au natural. Nice things to Emma + Horrible things to Emma = neutral so I guess he's in the clear. 

The Witches: Misunderstood

Mum and I got me a buzz cut on Monday so all the wispy bits were removed and I have a beautifully bald, oval head which is now always on show (Pictures on the blog)!!! I keep catching my round pale head by surprise in either my shadow or the mirror so get a mini shock each time, but bar removing all the mirrors and reflective surfaces in the house, I have to recall it's only temporary and my hair will return to it's rightful place on my head. The silver lining is that I haven't shaved my legs or under arms in a week- score!! For the record, in case you are keeping track, still have eyebrows and eyelashes! As this is a family friendly blog (occasional swear words notwithstanding) I will leave you to ponder on the status of the rest of my hair. Let's not over share!

Dad and I had a lovely, father-daughter day out to Costco yesterday which was marvelous. Please be expecting all your Christmas presents from this, my new favourite store. I will just leave it up to you as to whether you require a months supply of Haribo (or a 3 day supply for the Endemol office ;) ), a BFG sized tinned tuna or more loo roll than you can shake a stick at. Who said practicality wasn't glamorous!!  

A-Mazing! The best place in the world...ever

Project House-into-Home is very much underway and I am slowly turning our abode into a lovely little set up for us both, although the circumstances are rather different from what I ever wanted or imagined them to be (who thinks they will get cancer!), when I am feeling well it's nice to be able to do things my previously busy life would not have allowed like bake (albeit badly and from a packet) and sort out my old clothes for ebay. This is obviously the silver lining though- I'd much rather be healthy and back to normal but I'm sure that time will come and I'll catch myself craving my lethargic Cancer life momentarily- if just for the pace of life rather than the delightful chemo treatment!  

As this email has taken me a ridiculous 3 days and woke me up at the middle of the night, at 5:18am i will sign off.

I hope you all have wonderful bonfire nights and sorry I couldn't deliver on my party promise (joint McKnight decision that it was just a bit too risky). Be safe and wrap up warm and we'll speak soon.

Lots of love and kisses

Em

XXX